I knew it

I knew exactly what went wrong. I knew it before you did. I knew it.

As I was going through my life, re-reading my past, I just realized that I had clues that we weren't meant for each other. Every smile, every words, every feeling that we shared were forced to exist. It was painful, yes but it made me realize I did own a heart, I had feelings too, and that I was not an ice queen.

I am very thankful that I once had a chance to know what love means. As people say, its better to love than not love at all. I don't know what is left for me in the future but what I do know is, life is so beautiful to be wasted.

I know you would tell, 'I told you so, you will get angry with me.' Yes, I am angry with you and what you did to me but I will never regret anything. You were right, I'll hate you. As I rediscover myself, I am hating you more. I told you, I just need to go through the process of moving on and right now, I am in the anger phase.

Every friend I talk to, they all tell me that I made the right decision and that you are not worth it. I know it now. They unanimously agree that you will do no good to me, I may refuse to believe it before but now, you have already proven it to me. You have no right to know anything about me anymore. You are not a friend, you are a stranger now.

But the whole circus is not all about your faults, I know am part of it and I knew what I was and what I've become every time I was with you. I am this nice girl that guys never liked. All along I thought I was never nice and I'll just wake up one day living the life of a nice girl.

I want to say sorry to myself. I lost who I am because I was so in love and blinded. I changed to a person who I never thought I will be. I've lost ME. I knew it.

Hearing our break-up song right now brings no emotions anymore, just memories of our past that you choose to give up. I am getting better, I know I can survive this ordeal. I am that girl.

I look forward to my beautiful life ahead, with all my friends and family.

I know one day, I will meet that one person who is really meant for me.
I know one day, I will have that 'and they live happily ever after'
I know he will come to my life to make me realize that all my heartaches are worth it because a lifetime of happiness is just right ahead of me.
I know God is writing my own love story now and when I'm ready He will drop him in my life.

I know it. 

Start of a New Chapter

Finally, I've received the closure that I need, the answers to my questions. Finally, I can start a new chapter of my life.

As they all say, charge it to experience and I really didn't regret anything. I just did what I knew was right, to LOVE. I was happy when I was in that journey but like some stories, this had come to its end.

Letting go of the one you LOVE is never an easy thing but sometimes when it is becoming destructive you have no choice but to stop and let go.

Moving ON has its stages, everyone of us have to go through that stages, and now, I'm in the acceptance stage. I can now truly say that, I am ready to take that step, I am ready to open a new chapter of my life.

I will take my LIFE back. I know I will LOVE again. I will not rush myself. I will just live the moment, with no regrets.

I look forward on the day I can say to myself I am ready to open my heart again and I will make sure it will be forever.

Bakasyon Grande!

First time kong magpabook online at hindi lang basta 3D/2N, 5 days! Si Ivy Claire ang may kasalanan nito. Anyway, dahil first ever bakasyon grande ko ito for this year (wag sanang bagyuhin), maglilista ako ng mga gusto kong puntahan sa Cebu at Dumaguete :)

Nakita ko sa internet yung photo ng Rizal Boulevard mukhang magandang mag food trip dun sa gabi, parang manila bay ang effect (less the pollution siguro), sabi eat tempura and balot at night, hindi ko kinakain lahat ng laman ng balot so yung tempura na lang, masarap ba?

Siliman University, parang UP daw ito, gusto kong makita :)

Belfry Tower, pwede bang akyatin yun? parang ang sarap mag picture ng silhouette dun :)

Santo Nino Basilica - sa Cebu, ganda ng top shot 

Cebu Heritage Monument - malayo ba to?

Maganda nga yung Fort sa Cebu :)

Siquijor Island - gusto ko malaman yung feeling magstay dito :)

gusto ko din pala magbeach (kung hindi maulan)

**sa ngayon yan na muna 

Another Year

Ilang tulog na lang, birthday ko na ulit, parang kelan lang, isang taon na din pala ang nakalipas. 

Sa bawat pahina ng buhay ko, pakiramdam ko 360 degrees ang ikot nito, nakakahilo.

Bawat pahina, merong aral na iniiwan. Gusto kong maniwala na madami akong natutunan sa nakaaraang taon ng buhay ko at nagpapasalamat ako sa mga tao na naging bahagi nito. Alam ko na sa mga dadarating na mga araw, mas magiging matatagtag pa ako at mas magiging makabuluhan ang buhay ko. 

Sabi nga ng professor ko, learning is when you already apply the knowledge otherwise you just know them. Sobrang totoo, akala ko natuto na ako dahil "alam" ko na ang isang bagay, hindi pa ganoon yun, masasabi kong natuto na ako pag naiapply ko na ang kaalaman na yun sa buhay ko. 

Gusto kong magpasalamat sa lahat ng mga kaibigan ko na laging andyan para sa akin, alam kong isang tawag lang, dadamayan ninyo na ako. Sa lahat ng mga nakasakit sa akin, salamat na din dahil tinuruan ninyo ako kung paano maging matatag. 

I'm so sorry sa lahat ng mga nasaktan ko at napaiyak ko, sinasadya ko man o hindi na saktan kayo, I'm sorry. Hindi ko irarationalize ang mga nagawa ko sa inyo, patawarin ninyo ko.

A prayer sent to heaven:

Dear God,

I am here again, as always, asking for a lot of strength because I know I will be needing them in the near future. Lord, I will not ask why You gave me these trials, I just want to thank You for giving me a chance to be strong. I know where ever I am, You hear my heart's desires, my heart's wishes, even if I don't open it up to You, I know You can hear them. I give up everything to You, all my pains, all my heartaches, all my questions, all my sufferings, all my life. I know You will never give me something that I cannot handle and I know You will not leave me.

Lord, thank You for giving me another chance to live my life. Thank You for always being there at my side, for always accommodating me. I can do everything in this world just be by my side. 

Thank You. Thank You. Thank You and I love You. Amen.

LIfe is so short so make the most out of it :)

Change Nothing by Jessica Sanchez

Everyday I'm waking up to dejavu
Someone's always telling me not to stick with you
Could it be the nights we spent to fixin' us
I never thought that we were really that messed up

Should've shut my mouth and kept it all to myself
Cause now they've got me feeling I should be with somebody else.

They say we don't fit together
And I could do better, There's always something
They don't know the hell we've been through
Cause when you hold me like you do
That's when I wanna change nothing

There were times when we would kiss with bitter lips
It don't matter when the good ones taste like this
Maybe we were broken more than once or twice
What we got bad or not I'm not gonna compromise

I should have never let their words get under my skin
Cause all I ever wanted was to find a way through this

They say we don't fit together
I could do better, There's always something
They don't know the hell we've been through
Cause when you hold me like you do
That's when I wanna change nothing, Oh
That's when I wanna change nothing

Should've shut my mouth and kept it all to myself

No, no, oh, ooooh, yeah...

They say we don't fit together and I could do better
There's always something
Oooohhh.... (They don't know the hell we've been through,Cause when you hold me like you do)
That's when I wanna change nothing, Oh
That's when I wanna change nothing
That's when I wanna change nothing, Oh
That's when I wanna change nothing...

We had a perfect relationship but I guess we both can't accept it.

Yung feeling na sa sobrang sakit wala akong maramdaman pero bigla na lang akong maiiyak >__<

Where do I go from here? ='(

Alam mo yung feeling na tapos na ang lahat? Yung binibilang mo na lang yung oras mo? Nakakasuka @__@

Its now or never! to quote katy perry's song: I'm letting go tonight

Divine Intervention

Alam ko na ang gagawin ko, siguro kaya hindi malinaw yung sinasabi Niya dahil may kulang akong dapat ginagawa, this time, I'll do it.

Lord, sorry po kung nagkulang ako sa Inyo. Alam ko po na ang dapat kong gawin kung gusto kong malaman ang tamang sagot. Kayo lang po ang makakapagbigay nito sa akin. Kayo na po bahala sa puso ko, ipinapaubaya ko na po ang lahat sa inyo, alam kong hindi Ninyo ito sasaktan. Lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon, ibinibigay ko na po sa Inyo. 

Kung hindi ako mabigyan ng tamang sagot ng Isip at Puso ko, ang Diyos, sigurado akong mabibigyan niya ako ng sagot.

Wide Awake

I'm wide awakeI'm wide awakeI'm wide awake
Yeah, I was in the darkI was falling hardWith an open heartI'm wide awakeHow did I read the stars so wrongI'm wide awakeAnd now it's clear to meThat everything you seeAin't always what it seemsI'm wide awakeYeah, I was dreaming for so long
[Pre-Chorus]I wish I knew thenWhat I know nowWouldn't dive inWouldn't bow downGravity hurtsYou made it so sweetTill I woke up onOn the concrete
[Chorus]Falling from cloud 9Crashing from the highI'm letting go tonight(Yeah I'm) Falling from cloud 9I'm wide awakeNot losing any sleepI picked up every pieceAnd landed on my feetI'm wide awakeNeed nothing to complete myself - nooohoooI'm wide awakeYeah, I am born again
Outta the lion's denI don't have to pretendAnd it's too lateThe story's over now, the end
[Pre-Chorus]I wish I knew thenWhat I know nowWouldn't dive inWouldn't bow downGravity hurtsYou made it so sweetTill I woke up onOn the concrete
[Chorus]Falling from cloud 9Crashing from the highI'm letting go tonight (yeah, I'm letting go)I'm Falling from cloud 9Thunder rumblingCastles crumblingI am trying to hold onGod knows that I triedSeeing the bright sideBut I'm not blind anymore...I'm wide awakeI'm wide awake
[Chorus]Yeah, I'm Falling from cloud 9Crashing from the highYou know I'm letting go tonightI'm Falling from cloud 9I'm wide awakeI'm wide awakeI'm wide awakeI'm wide awakeI'm wide awake

I am trying to hold on, God knows that I tried seeing the bright side. . .

Fell in deep slumber

Wala naman sa akin kung anong napapanaginipan niya pero the first time na nangyari to he told me he was bothered and he needs like time to think, magday hike kasi siya nun sakto daw dahil he can reflect.

I was so devasted nun bilang first time, I didn't know what to do, all I know is that we need to talk about it. I cried the whole night. Sobrang hirap gumising nun may report pa kami. Pagkasakay ko sa kotse niya hindi ko talaga napigilang umiyak ng bongga parang walang bukas. It was so pathetic. I even told him na hindi ko kaya yung feeling na wala siya, so pathetic di ba?! begging for love. Although I know I need to let him go, at sinabi ko yun sa kanya.

Sabi niya, he'll stay with me and that he will never leave me. I was so broken and vulnerable, it was the only thing can soothe the pain. I took him back in my life. I was struggling in the relationship, slowly I started to be okay and optimistic and then this dream pop again.

The dream was, he was dreaming that they were kissing and it felt so real and then the next day he saw her in her wedding gown marrying somebody else. It was a painful dream daw. 

What was weird was, I don't usually check his twitter timeline and FB. Something told me to check it yesterday and then I saw his twitter about questioning the existence of sub conscious and the he can't fight it and if his dreams will always be like that he wouldn't want to sleep again. I felt something and so I asked him about it. 

Everything is so hard for me. I felt that what we really need is a time away. I don't believe in cool off but I think it will somehow help you cope with the situation. He told me, I shouldn't think about it and that he is conquering everything for me because he loves me, etc.

Sabi ko sa kanya, I don't deserve to be in this situation parang ano bang nagawa ko sa buhay bakit ganito di ba? Hindi ko napigilang umiyak sa office.

Ako sure ako sa nararamdaman ko habang siya hindi. Ang hirap.

When will I ever be in your dreams?

Hindi ko alam kailangan ko pala ng dahilan. . .

The Big C

Hindi ito cancer. 

Big C = Commitment 

Naisip kong magpost about dito ay dahil sa singsing na pag-aari ko ngayon. 

Alam mo yung panahon na pinag-iisipan mo kung masaya ka pa ba sa relasyon ninyo, kung kaya mo pa, kung siya na ba? o kung dapat na ba kayong maghiwalay o hindi. May ilang beses ko na itong naisip wala pa man yung singsing, sa tuwing may problemang dumadating naiisip ko yun. May ilang beses ko ding naisip na makipaghiwalay na, kinausap ko siya pero wala, kami pa din. 

Mula nung binili namin yung singsing, palagi ko siyang tinitingnan at pag may iniisip ako tungkol sa relasyon namin, sinasalat ko siya tapos naiisip ko, "ito yung relasyon namin", "akin siya","mahal niya ako", ang pinakabigat ay yung: "hindi ako susuko" 

So eto pala yun, ganito pala yung feeling. Meron kayong isang bagay na pinanghahawakan. Napakalalim talaga ng ibig sabihin nito para sa isang magkasintahan, kaya pala siya ginagamit sa kasal to seal the deal. Iniisip ko dati na wala akong "sense of commitment". Pakiramdam ko na madali akong mabore sa mga bagay-bagay tulad ng trabaho at iniisip ko na baka ganun din ako sa relasyon. Sa ngayon naman, magdadalawang taon na ako sa trabaho ko at ayos naman ako, nasasakyan ko na ang agos ng buhay dito. Siguro yung pagkabore sa mga bagay ay dala din ng edad. Habang tumatagal, nagkakaroon ka ng pasensya para sakyan ang reyalidad ng buhay. Siguro naman matatagalan ko ang relasyon na ito. 

Tinanong ako ng kaibigan ko, bakit daw ganun, kahit ilang beses mong tangkaing tapusin na ang lahat, walang nangyayari, kayo pa din? May sagot man ako pero hindi ko naman masabing ganun din ang sa kanya. Pero simple lang ang sinabi ko: Dahil MAHAL mo siya. Nabasa ko sa internet na "Isyu o problema ang tinatapos hindi relasyon". Totoo naman. Ang tanong lang dyan, ilang problema ang kaya mong tapusin o lagpasan? Hanggang kailan ka tatagal?

Gusto kong matakot pero gusto ko din na yakapin ito (commitment) ng buo. Nangingibabaw yung kagustuhan kong yakapin ito. Natatakot ako dahil alam ko na sa mundong ito walang kasiguraduhan ang mga bagay. Kahit na kasal na kayo ng 40 years pwede pa din kayong magkahiwalay ano pa kaya yung ilang buwan palang. Madalas niyang marinig sa akin yung salitang "kalma lang". Kalma lang ako sa relasyon namin, sabi nga, ienjoy lang muna ang buhay at yun na ang ginagawa ko. Wag magmadali. Hindi ko naman kinakaila na gusto ko nang magka-anak. Alam ko na bata pa ako para dun, hindi ko lang maiwasan na maiinggit sa mga anak ng kaibigan ko. Alam ko na hindi madali pero ano naman, anak ko naman yun. Gagawin mo ang lahat para sa anak mo hindi ba? Pero dahil hindi pa siya posible ngayon, kalma lang. Andami kong plano di ba? Ayokong pangunahan ang kagustuhan Niya para sa akin pero sana tama ang mga desisyon ko sa buhay. 

Ang Big C na ito ay ang The Ring ng buhay ko. Ang singsing na sumisimbolo sa commitment namin sa isa't isa. Gusto kong manalig sa relasyon namin.Gusto kong maniwala na tamang landas ang tinatahak ko. Gusto kong magmahal hangga't kaya ko.

The Ring

Hindi ito yung horror movie ah pero yung literal na singsing. 

Isa siyang friendship ring! hehe! joke! Commitment ring daw namin ito. I wasn't expecting him to buy us a ring. Kaya nung niyaya niya akong bumili, hindi ako prepared pero bumili pa din naman kami. We had to wait for a day before we got the item dahil sa lazer engrave chorva. Kalma lang yung feeling after namin na bumili. Tapos while waiting, tumataas yung excitement level tapos nung nakuha na namin, I have this feeling na parang hindi siya totoo. 

I can't help it but to stare at it every time I have a chance (which is like after every 2 seconds?! tulad ngayon na nagtatype ako, hehehe). Hindi ko naman first time na magsuot ng singsing pero first time ko mabigyan ng singsing na galing sa isang tao. Iba pala yung feeling. Para siyang may sumpa (positive note ito), weird. Parang tumaas ng isang level yung relationship. Ayokong magsalita ng patapos at ayoko din mag-assume pero sana nga siya na. 

Hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ako o hindi na I'm going to stick sa original plan ko dati na after kong magMA ay tska ako magpapakasal and all hmmm

Outing with Ted's Family

Ang lakad na di pinaplano nangtutupad

NFS: New Found Self

Lately, I've been an insecure girlfriend. I turned out to be a jealous one and honestly, I hate it. I know that I am not that kind of person. I have these issues clogging my reasoning and clouding my judgment. I was trying to get up from the ground but I can't seem to stand. 

Then I tortured myself more, I checked the girl's FB account. Out of curiosity. I wanted to know who is this girl that my boyfriend has a crush on. Know your competition (insert evil laugh). Then I found out that there's nothing special about her, she looks normal, not pretty, not ugly, she looks just okay. Then something struck me. Here I am sulking over this ill feelings inside me just because of nobody. I may sound very mayabang but I know that I am a lot better than her. I just know it and I believe in it. 

I am taking up my masters. I am working in one of the biggest network in the Philippines. I graduated in a reputable university. I worked hard to get where I am right now. I have my dreams and I am living it. I am smart and I exactly know how to get what I want. I am claiming it (walang kokontra). I am this person. I almost forgot that I have my own life to live. 

I don't know where, when and how it happened but it seems that I lost a part of myself while having a relationship with him. I guess, its a phase I need to go through. And now, I am over it. 

This line: "Its his loss not mine" sank into my mind. Hell yes, it will be really his loss. 

When he met me, I have that kind of thinking, I am very assured of myself, I can intimidate guys. I guess I've put down all my defenses the moment I fell in love with him. Now, I know where I stand. If he wanted to mess up our relationship then go ahead, I know I did my very best to work on our relationship. He will not be the last guy on earth. Painful, yes but I can't put myself down just because of an unworthy person. 

I'm done making him my world. I have my own world to live and I will make it the best. 

I understand and accepted how this unfair life works. I understand how I should love myself too. I feel so empowered. God is so good to me to make me realize all these things. 

We are still in a relationship and we didn't break up or something. I will still make our relationship stronger and better without sacrificing my own happiness, my own dreams and my own life. I will not stalk the girl's twitter and FB account just to fish for information, its just a waste of time. I will also stop decoding his cryptic tweets and posts. I will let him be himself and I will be me.

Am I mean to think this way? I hope not because I feel soo okay. It feels right.

From The Secret Daily Teachings: Love is the highest power we possess to be in complete harmony with the law of attraction. The more love we feel the greater our power. The more selfless love we feel, the more unfathomable our power. The law of attraction has been called the law of love, because the law itself is a gift of love to humanity. It is the law by which we can create incredible lives for ourselves. The more love we feel the greater our power to create a magnificent life of love, joy, and harmony.

Dumating na ba kayo sa point na nafeel ninyong gusto ninyong magpakasal, pero you have no one in mind naman para maging groom?

how to not over analyze things

Relationship Status

I can't believe that in a short span of time my world really turned 360 degrees (again). From Single to In a Relationship to Its Complicated to In a Relationship again. Bawat phase andami kong natutunan, andami kong narealize. 

Sabi ko nga, siguro dahil late bloomer ako, binibigyan ako ni Lord ng mga heavygat na trials. Naisip ko, sana hindi ako binigla, sana yung mga petty muna, yung simpleng mga arguments muna pero baka I'm too old for petty quarrels or should I say, I'm too mature for that (heheh! yes I claim that I am mature).

I know hanggang sa puntong ito, wala pa ring conclusion, wala pa ring kasiguraduhan pero walang masamang maghangad ng magandang kapalaran. Gusto kong ishare sa inyo yung experience ko the past months at lalo na yung mga natutunan ko. 

1. TRUST is the most important thing in the relationship more than LOVE.  Sobrang totoo ito. Kaya nga once malamatan yang trust na yan ang hirap ng ibalik sa dati ang lahat. Ako yung tipo ng tao na nakikita ko yung mga tao na mabubuti lahat, kahit sabihin nila na hindi okay o masama siya, hindi ko siya ibiview na ganun unless maprove ko sa sarili ko na totoo yung sinasabi nila. Kaya naman madali akong magtiwala pero pag nawala yun, mahirap ibalik. Alam kong hindi ako clingly na girlfriend, hindi ako grabe kung magselos (nagseselos pa din ako pero in moderation), hindi ako demanding, di ba sabi nga niya low maintenance lang ako? 100% yung trust na binigay ko. Somewhere down the path, it was tested by fate. Nangarag ang puso ko ng bongga. I didn't know how to handle it. I panicked. Salamat sa mga mabubuti kong kaibigan they helped me survived that ordeal. One day naging paranoid ako at naniniwala akong may pinaghuhugutan yung pagiging paranoid ko, nagburst na lang yung mga pent up emotions. Nag-away kami, then I realized na mali nga ako. I apologized pero sinabi ko din yung pinaghuhugutan ko. He understands where I am coming from. Sa panahon na ito, I am rebuilding it. 

2. Make an effort to stay and to hold on. EFFORT, eto siguro yung kulang sa relationship namin or should I say kulang sa kanya. I remember posting this line: "When someone stops trying, relationship starts to fail." Super true. Hindi lang siguro sa part niya pero pati na din sa akin. I started to stop understanding him or even trying to get through him. Somehow, nagpabaya din siguro ako, losing my patience and all. 

3. People don't necessarily change, they just show their true colors. Check na check! Yes people change pero it could also be that you just don't know them well. Kulang yung ilang months lang para makilala mo ang isang tao. Though hindi mo naman kailangan ng madaming years para lubusan silang makilala, it just takes a problem to know them better. Pag andyan na yung problema, dun mo siya mas makikilala. Paano ba niya hinandle yung sitwasyon, etc. 

4. Through thick or thin, you should be there for him. Mahirap pala to? Ngayon ko lang nalaman yun. Halatang nangangapa pa ako. Palagi natin tong naririnig na parte ng isang wedding vow pero para isabuhay to, hindi pala ganun ganun na lang. Yung tipong andyan ka pa din kahit hindi ka niya maitreat for lunch or dinner (shallow thing lang ito ah and I am not saying na malaking percentage yung panlilibre), yung kahit hindi ka niya maihatid sa bahay ninyo dahil kulang siya sa budget keri lang, yung tipong hindi na maganda yung nangyayari sa buhay pero andyan ka pa din. Hindi to basta basta at lalong hindi ito minamadali. 

5. Be careful what you wish for because you might get it. Wag tayong wish ng wish ng basta basta lalo na kung hindi ka handa dun sa wish mo. Ilang beses ko tong naprove, all ears si Lord sa mga wishes ko lately kaya ayan. Digital na ang pag-grant ng wishes.

Minsan akala mo kaya mo na, na alam mo na lahat, yun pala hindi pa. Madami pa akong kailangang matutunan sa relasyon na ito, hindi ko alam kung hanggang saan kami makakarating pero isa lang ang sigurado ako, willing akong i-take yung chance na to. Eto na yung RISKS when falling in love, yes, ito na yun mga kaibigan. 

Its up to you if trials will make or break your relationship. You are the captain of your own ship sabi nga nila. Let us try to live our lives to the fullest and be thankful for all the trials because it will make us stronger and a better person. Walang perfect relationship at lalong walang happily ever after dahil wala tayo sa fairy tale. Ang meron lang ay dalawang taong nagmamahalan **shet ang cheezy!tama na!*

What is LOVE?

I remember answering the very same question few years ago, even when I was still in grade school through the different slumbooks and autographs. I didn't know that it will take me 24 years to really realize the real answer to this question. 

Love is blind.

It may sound cliche but its true. I hate to admit it but yes, love is blind (in all aspect). When you love you don't mind their flaws and faults, you just accept them as they are. No questions asked. Even if their actions may seem to be not appropriate or is not generally accepted by the majority, you simply don't care.

Love is like a rosary full of mysteries.

In love, you really have to go through all the mysteries of life from the joyful to sorrowful to glorious mystery and even the luminous mystery. Its not always happiness or pain there is a balance of everything in a relationship. That is how God made our lives. Perfect. Someone told me that perfection depends on the person's perspective and I believe him. How we view life or love will say whether or not we achieved "perfection". 

Love is an unexplainable emotion.

True. I can't even describe how it works, when it starts and how it will end. Probably, we can explain it base on how we feel at that moment but it'll not be clear as the sky. 

But God already provided us the perfect definition of what love is through the Bible:

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

I wanted to live by this definition. If I wanted to work on this relationship, I have to believe Him. 

Always protects.

Always trusts.

Always hopes.

Always perseveres.

I know GOD is always there for me, for us. He will guide us in the right path. 

How to give a second chance? I am having a hard time to forget everything =(

Paano na ang Puso ko

Rating:	★★★★
Category:	Music
Genre:	Other
Artist:	Bugoy Drilon

4 1/2 stars dahil mejo nakakarelate ako sa ilang parts ng kanta

Di ko alam ang gagawin
kung puso ko ay susundin
Natatakot na di mo pansinin
Kayhirap isipin na mahal kita sinta
Ngayong nakikitang mayroong ibang mahal

Refrain:
Sana’y pagbigyan, mabigyan ng pagkakataon
Ang tanong sa isip ko
Nasasaktan ang puso ko

Chorus:
Paano na ang puso ko na umiibig sa yo
Ngayong ikaw ay mayroon nang ibang gusto
Sana noon pa sinabi ko na
Na minamahal kita
Baka sakali pang naging
Tayong naging dalawa
Umiiyak ang puso ko
Ito’y baka dahil sa yo
Kayhirap palang umibig sa katulad mo
Kayhirap siguro na
Minamahal kita sinta
Ngayong nakikitang may mahal ka nang iba

Repeat Refrain
Repeat Chorus

Hanggang pangarap na lang
Hanggang pangarap na lang
Ang pag-ibig ko sa yo
Dahil alam kong di na magiging tayo
Paano na ako
Paano na ang puso ko

Repeat Chorus

I didn't know na ganito pala ako katanga pagdating sa pag-ibig!

Dear Almighty God

Lord, I am praying to you now because I don't know what to do with this situation. I surrender all the pains and heartaches that I am currently experiencing. Please lead me to the right direction, help me turn all my weaknesses to strengths.If You think I need more of this, I am willing to accept it. I know, You will not give this to me if you know I can't handle it. Enlighten my mind so that I will make the right decisions in life. And Lord, whatever happens, please be there for me. Help me accept everything. Amen

namimiss kong mag basa ng PBs, kung pwede lang maextend ang time =(

The moment you stop trying, relationship starts to fail.

..."In the first six months to a year, it’s all excitement and an adrenaline rush at the mere fantasy of skin touching..." ang weird naman parang hindi naman to applicable sa amin!

Never say that someone completes you. We have to feel whole even when we are by ourselves, for needing a certain someone is not LOVE but dependency. Wanting a person to become a part of our life is the best reason for having them. So rather than search for that someone who will complete you, wait for the person who will complement your completeness.

Hindi ko na kasalanan kung matamaan ka sa mga posts ko.

Blah.Blah.Blah

Think before you click.

Ito ang dapat na panata namin.

May point naman, we should be responsible for our posts. Hindi lang naman tayo ang nakakabasa nito kundi ang Whole Web World so dapat maging maingat. 

What I couldn't understand is that pati pagtethank you ko sa boyfriend ko eh prohibited na din? 

Una, thank you lang naman yun.

Pangalawa, boyfriend KO naman yun

Pangatlo, account ko yun

Pang-apat, that's just the way I appreciate

Pang-lima, I LOVE YOU lang yun.

blah.blah.blah.

Bawal na lahat?! 

Paki explain naman sa akin ang "sobrang mahal mo na" baka kasi may hindi ako naiintindihan.

Love at your best

Lately, madalas kong marinig yung phrase na "sobrang mahal mo na ata siya" o "huwag masyadong magmahal".

Nawiweirduhan lang ako. Fan ako ng mga romance stories kaya hindi ko alam kung may kinalaman yun sa opinyon ko about dito pero weird lang.

Sabi nga, masama ang sobra. Pero masama din bang ibigay ang best mo sa isang relasyon?

Live your life to the fullest.

Kailangan bang maidefine and difference ng sobra sa best?

Eto ang naiisip ko tungkol dyan:

Ayokong dumating yung time na may regrets ako. Yung tipong may maiisip akong what ifs. Tell me if I'm wrong pero gusto ko lang na maibigay lahat ng makakaya ko para sa taong mahal ko. Nega akong tao, alam ninyo yan. Iniisip ko na baka dumadating yung time na magkakahiwalay kami and all kaya parang kailangan kong maipakita kahit papaano na I did my best. Ayokong maging isang tao na ibibigay yung best effort niya pag hiwalay na. Yung tipong loving from afar ang drama after ng hiwalayan. Hindi ba mas madaling mag move on pag ganun? Pwede mong sabihin sa sarili mo na hindi ka nagkulang, at that's the end of it. Mas madali yung acceptance process. Ayokong dumating yung oras na sasabihin ko sa sarili ko na, huli na ang lahat wala na.

Sabi ko nga, hangga't kayang kong intindihin, iintindihin ko. Hindi ko sasabihing martir ako pero hindi ba't ganun naman dapat? Bigayan lang. Give and take. Huwag nating iequate yung pagmamahal natin sa isang tao. Hindi natin yun madadaan sa percentage, kung ilang percent mo ba siya mahal o dami/amount ng gifts o kung ilang beses kang nag-antay atbp. 

Love is immeasurable.

Pwede namang 100% yung love mo para sa kanya tapos 100% mo ding mahal ang sarili mo. Bakit kailangan pa nating hati-hatiin yung 100% lang? Huwag natin limitahan ang kakayahan nating magmahal. Huwag nating kitidan ang pag-iisip natin para hindi tayo lamunin ng selos at inggit. Magmahal tayo tulad ng Diyos. Unconditional love.

Payo ko lang:

Kung may mahal ka, ipaalam mo sa kanyang mahal mo siya malay mo mahal ka din niya (cliche man pakinggan pero totoo)

Mahalin mo din ang sarili mo para mahalin ka din ng ibang tao. Maging karapat-dapat ka para sa nakatakda sayo, hindi yung hinahayaan mo lang ang sarili mo sa dilim tapos itatanong mo kung bakit walang nakakapansin sayo e ganito-ganyan ka naman. 

Love at your best